When in the Anguish of Suicide…

When in suicidal anguish
The people awaited the German guests,
And the severe spirit of Byzantium
From the Russian Church flew away;
When the Capital on the Neva,
Having forgotten her grandeur,
Like a drunken slut,
Didn’t know who would take her next,

A voice came to me. It called comfortingly,
It said: “Come here,
Leave your land, deaf and sinful,
Leave Russia forever.
I will wash the blood from you hands
And draw the black shame from you heart,
I’ll cover over with a new name
The pain of injuries and offence.”
But indifferently and peacefully
With my hands I covered my ears
That by that unworthy speech
My wounded spirit be not defiled.

Anna Andreevna Akhmatova
Autumn 1917